Ya'll are smart people.

Okay people. When I say I love my crock-pot because "you put shit in, and food comes out," I do mean it. And I meant it when I said you can put anything in a crockpot.
Recently a friend was telling me about a girl who had heard from somebody (and I feel guilty, as I'm pretty sure it was me) that she could put anything in a crockpot. So she put in some leftover turkey, some rice, some canned tomatoes, and some grape jelly.
People. Let's regroup. I'm almost 2/3rds a lawyer, so I can tell you this: A reasonable person in the reader's position would not have thought that anything meant that turkey and grape jelly would go together. Let's be reasonable here!
Possible crock-pot combos:
Beans, tomatoes, garlic, onions, and rice. Just make sure you have enough liquid that the rice cooks.
Tofu, a marinade, and fresh vegetables.
Tofu, potatoes, peas, green beans, peppers, a helluva lot of curry, and some coconut milk.
Maraschino cherries, pineapple, cake mix, and butter.
Chili beans, chili powder, and a whole hunk of meat.
Salmon in foil packets with lemon juice and olive oil over a bed of potatoes.
All of these things are what I meant by "you put shit in, and food comes out."
I realize that not everyone can cook well - but here's the thing - the crockpot cooks food for you. It is not magically able to transform grape jelly into gravy.
Are we clear?